Fishing Tramp

A guy has been fishing on a river all day and caught nothing. He sees a tramp fishing nearby who is pulling one trout after another out…and throwing them back in. He tells over to him, “hey, why don’t you keep the fish…they are good eating?”
The tramp yells back, “Oh, the fish are easy to catch….its that $^#@* mattress I’m after”.

Jimmy Savile joke

Q. What’s the difference between a McDonald’s straw and a Jimmy Savile victim?
A. A McDonald’s straw is a single-use plastic and a Jimmy Savile victim is a single-use spastic!