New Jokes

Women find it ‘disgusting’ that a man can look at a woman, evaluate multiple diverse factors to arrive at one number to rate her a on a scale from zero to ten. How is that any better than the fact that a woman can look at a man and evaluate him in his entirety on one number?

His annual salary.

It was a very hot Wednesday here in Florida. Bessie, our Hump-Day Camel, stopped dead in her tracks.

I thought I might have to call for a tow truck to get a camel tow, but a camel expert said, “Seeing it’s such a hot day, give ‘er a swift kick in the arse.”

So I did. I got up on a ladder and gave Old Bessie a swift boot. She immediately proceeded to pass such an incredible fart, I thought I would pass out for lack of Oxygen.

The camel expert said, “Just as expected on a hot day. Vapor lock.”

Does anyone else get these little local Gazettes about what is happening in their subdivision or block or small town?

I was reading in one such newspaper about a 15 year-old blonde girl who was ousted from the local chapter of the Future Farmers of America.

She couldn’t keep her calves together.

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Hot Jokes This Week

The Horse Lover

A worried patient went to his psychiatrist. “I’m in love with my horse,” he said .

“But that’s nothing,” replied the shrink. “A lot of people love animals. For instance, my wife and I have a dog that we love very much.”

“Ah, but doctor,” the patient replied. “It’s a sexual attraction that I feel toward my horse.”

“Ahhh!” exclaimed the doc. “What kind of a horse is it? Male or female?”

“Female, of course,” said the dude. “What do you think I am, a faggot??!”

Facebook should make a bigger deal over privacy, certainly as far as photos are concerned.

I managed to find a really attractive girl I’d seen before, and without adding her, I could see all her photos, including some in a bikini.

I mean, she’s lucky it’s only me wanking and not some pervert.

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