Schwartz is Dead

A mortician was working late one night examining dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried.

As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, who was about to be cremated, he was amazed. Schwartz had the longest ‘member’ he had ever seen!

“I’m sorry, Mr. Schwartz,” said the mortician, “but I can’t send you off to be cremated with such a tremendously huge as this. It has to be saved for posterity.”

With that, the coroner used his tools to remove the dead man’s unit. He then stuffed his prize into a briefcase and took it home.

The first person he showed it to was his wife.

“I have something to show you that you won’t believe,” he said as he opened up his briefcase.

“Oh my God!” the wife suddenly screamed, “Schwartz is dead!