Brilliant Student

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% ON AN EXAM – I would have given him 100%. 

Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die?  * his last battle

Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?  * at the bottom of the  page

Q3. River  Ravi  flows in which state?  * liquid

Q4. What is the main reason for divorce?  * marriage

Q5. What is the main reason for failure?  * exams

Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast?  * Lunch & dinner

Q7. What looks like half an apple?  * The other half

Q8. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?  * It will simply become wet

Q9. How can a man go eight days without sleeping ?  * No problem, he sleeps at night.

Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?  * You will never find an elephant that has only one hand..

Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand, what would you have ?  * Very large hand

Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a  wall, how long would it take four men to build it?  * No time at all, the wall is already  built.

Q13. How can u drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?  *Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

As heard on the street

  • Six time hot dog eating champion, Takeru Kobayashi, was arrested after this year’s contest and charged with trespassing…..Believe me, you don’t want to be known in jail as a hot dog eating champion.
  • According to a new survey by “Self” magazine, 50 percent of single women have sex 3 to 5 times a week. Ever wonder who these women are having sex with? Well, it is called “Self” magazine…
  • Scientists think Neanderthals lived fast and died young. So don’t expect to see a third season of “Jersey Shore.”
  • Bill Clinton has a cameo in the new “Hangover 2? movie. When asked why Clinton was in the movie, the producer said, “There are some things even Mike Tyson won’t do.”
  • Facebook is now combining e-mail, instant messaging and text messaging…To create a world where nothing gets done at the workplace ever again.
  • There’s an iPhone app to let you pee on the phone to test for STD.It’s being called the best app ever … to load onto somebody else’s phone.
  • A woman in Illinois was arrested for hitting a police officer with a sex toy. There’s a good chance she’ll get off…
  • A black couple in England has given birth to a white baby with blue eyes. The father says it is “simply unexplainable.” This kind of thing happens more often than you would think, according to the couple’s white friend.
  • A report indicates Viagra can cause temporary hearing loss in men. So guys, you can have sex, but you can’t hear the woman talk afterwards. In a related story, Viagra sales have skyrocketed.