Interesting Facts

[1] Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.

[2] Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

[3] Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

[4] I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried – but they wanted cash.

[5] A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school uniforms.

[6] Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

[7] Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.

[8] You can’t buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

[9] Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

[10] Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

[11] Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.

[12] My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong and she agrees with me.

[13] Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

[14] Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

[15] A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

[16] You’re getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

[17] It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

[18] Real friends are the ones who nds up with the same boss.

[18] Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.

[19] Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

[20] Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something

[21] They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak!

[22] Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but then the thought of long life will never come.

[23]Why do couples hold hands during their wedding? It’s a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

[24]Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[25]It’s funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It’s like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

[26]There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.
of resting before you get tired.

If only ……. Classic

A guy is strolling along road in Bangkok when a stunning hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks, “How much?’

The Hooker replies, “$500 for a hand-job.’
The guy’s jaw drops: “$500 dollars, For a hand-job! No hand-job is worth that kind of money!’

The hooker says, “Do you see that Hard Rock cafe on the corner?’
“Yes.’
“Do you see the Hard Rock about a block further down?’
“Yes.’
“And beyond that, do you see that third Cafe?’
“Yes.’
“Well,” says the hooker, smiling invitingly, “I own those. And, I own them because I give a hand-job that’s worth $500.’
The Guy says, “What the hell? I’ll give it a try.’

They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing that he just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500. He is so amazed, he says, “I suppose a blow-job is $1,000?’
The hooker replies, “$1,500.’

“$1,500? No blow-job could be worth that.’
The hooker replies, “Step over here to the window, big boy. See that huge HOTELĀ  just across the street? I own it. And I own it because I give a blow-job that’s worth every cent of $1,500.’
The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific hand-job, says, “Sign me up.’

Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more amazed than before. He can’t believe it but he feels he truly got his money’s worth. He decides to dip into the pension savings for one glorious and unforgettable experience. He asks the hooker,
“How much for some pu**y?’

The hooker says, “Come over here to the window. Do you see how the whole city of bangkok is laid out before us, all those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and showplaces?’
“Damn!” the guy says, in awe, “You own the whole city?’
“No,” the hooker replies………..”but I would if I had a pu**y.’

YO MAMA JOKES

  • Yo Mama JokesYo Mama so fat when she went to the movies she sat next to everyone.
  • Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.
  • Yo momma is so fat, she can’t get out of 2011
  • Your mom’s so fat she can’t even jump to a conclusion.
  • Your mamas so fat, she needs a watch on both arms because she covers two time zones.
  • Your mamas so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she doesn’t get a menu, she gets an estimate.
  • Your mama so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says, “OK”!
  • Yo mama so fat, when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party.
  • Your mama so fat your bath tub has stretch marks.
  • Your mamas so fat that when she jumps for joy, she gets stuck
  • Yo mama so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
  • Your momma’s so poor she can’t even pay attention!
  • Your mamma is so poor she was kicking a can down the street, asked what she was doing and she said moving.
  • Yo momma is so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook.
  • Yo momma so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
  • Yo momma’s so fat that when she asked for a water bed, they threw a blanket over the pacific ocean.
  • Your momma’s so fat, your family pictures have to be taken by a satellite!
  • Yo momma’s so slutty shes got a party in her mouth tonight, and everybody’s cumming.
  • Yo Momma’s so fat, when she walks by the TV I miss a season of Friends.
  • Yo momma is so fat she falls off both sides of the bed.
  • Yo momma so old her birth certificate expired.
  • Your momma is so fat, when she stood in the scale to get weighed it read -(one at a time please!!!!!!)

Click the links below for more Yo Mama Jokes

Yo Mama Jokes
Yo Mama So Old
Yo Mama So Poor
Yo Mama So Fat
Yo Mama So Ugly