I have a joke for you

I called my friend just now and said, “I have a joke for you.”

Friend: “Ok shoot”

Me: “What has a tiny penis and hangs down?”

Friend: “I dunno what?”

Me: A bat.. now what has an enormous penis and hangs up?

Friend: I dunno what?

Click

Surf Board

My wife’s seen some of the big Christmas presents I’ve been wrapping, and she looked at the one with her name on it and said, “Darling, a surfboard ! You know I love the beach.”

She might be even more excited when she sees the legs that are meant to go under it that I had to wrap separately.

is this snake poisonous

A boy scout says to his scout leader, “Sir, is this snake poisonous?”

The scout leader says, “No, that snake’s not poisonous at all.” So the boy picks up the snake, which bites him and the boy starts to spasm and foam at the mouth as the other kids look on in horror…

The scout leader says, “But that snake is venomous. Poison is ingested or absorbed, while venom is injected. Let’s get it right next time, boys.”

huge disadvantage

‘I just feel like being black is a huge disadvantage no matter how much skill you have ‘ said my friend.

‘oh come on, it’s just one move at the start of the game’ I responded as I took his Knight.