That sound you hear when you already closed the cupboard & hear something fall -yeah, that’s the sound of someone else’s problem.
I’ve been watching far too much TV lately. My dreams have adverts in them now.
Damn girl are you a newspaper? Because there’s a new issue with you every fucking day
I don’t know what the big deal is about Black Friday. All Fridays matter.
I can’t believe the new iPhone looks just like the old one. How will people know I’m better than they are?