Funny Whatsapp Status

  1. I haven’t seen a Brazilian as bad as Fred since Stevie Wonder shaved his wife’s pussy.
  2. I would suggest that Brazil build a bridge and get over it… but given their record….
  3. BREAKING: John Terry spotted changing into his full German kit.
  4. My German wife has just had a Brazilian. It was a Klose shave.
  5. Breaking News : Fulham have signed Brazil forward Fred to replace the Michael Jackson Statue outside of the ground.
  6. I haven’t seen anyone in a yellow jersey this disgraced since Lance Armstrong.
  7. 24 men sucked off in Magaluf. 11 f*cked in Belo Horizonte.
  8. That’s 49 -7 in dog goals.
  9. Let’s face it, it’s not the first time Germany’s sent a bunch of blokes to the showers in tears.
  10. I guess that is what a Brazilian wax feels like.
  11. Feel sorry for Julio Cesar tonight. Last time I saw a Brazilian facing this many shots he was jumping a ticket barrier at Stockwell.
  12. I regret every fart I ever held in for you.
  13. My Blonde wife just said to me “Do men call it a penis ’cause it pees and goes in us?”
  14. When you’re a kid, you hate those moments when there is absolutely nothing to do. As an adult, you live for them.
  15. Today was the annual Running of the Bulls in Spain. So if you’re sick of all the fake injuries at the World Cup, get ready for some real ones.
  16. An 81-year-old woman in the U.K. went sky diving to help raise money for a local hospital. They didn’t raise a lot of money, but they did get a new patient
  17. I just saw two blind and deaf lesbians walking down the street with their hands down one anothers knickers…..I think they were lip reading?
  18. My wife’s a ventriloquist, which means she has the ability to complain about having to give me a blowjob whilst actually giving me a blowjob.
  19. People have put Kim and Kanye’s names together to get, ‘Kimye’….I think a more accurate name would be…..Slunt.
  20. Man: ILYWoman: Awww write the words in full they mean more when theyre written properlyMan: Im leaving you