Black Lacy Number

My wife has just asked me if I want to go upstairs with her and she’ll put on a Black Lacy number for me.

I said, “No thanks, I fucking hate Agadoo.”

Hideous Painting

The Mother-in-Law came round this morning .
I knew it was her because next door’s Rotweiller was whimpering .
I let her in the hallway and she started ( Always criticising the old bat ! )
She pointed to a frame on the wall and said ‘Oh !
I suppose that hideous painting on the wall there is what you call Modern art?’
I said ‘No Mother-in-Law . It’s the new MIRROR!’