I phoned my wife today and said, “Pack a bag dear, I’ve booked us into a hotel for a few nights.” “Ooh, why’s that?” she asked. I said, “Well I’ve been playing poker all day, haven’t I!” “Really?” she asked again in excitement, “How much have you won?” “Nothing,” I replied. “I’ve lost the house.”
I was just about to place my chips on the roulette table at the casino when the African man standing next to me gave me a nudge and said, “Black, 33.” I shook his hand and said, “White, 28.”
I came home from the pub four hours late last night. “Where the fuck have you been?” screamed my wife. I said, “I’ve been playing poker with some blokes.” “Playing poker with some blokes?” she repeated. “Well, you can pack your bags and go!” “So can you” I said, “This isn’t our house anymore.”
They say one in every seven friends have a gambling addiction. My money’s on Bob.