I bumped into the guy that invented the globe. It’s a small world.
If opposites truly attract, the correct life strategy is to be a complete loser.
You can unfriend and block me on Facebook, unfollow me on Twitter, delete and block my number but you will NEVER unlick my butthole.
My daughter’s school teacher rang me today. “Young Sarah didn’t turn up for school today?” he said. “I know, her mother died yesterday,” I replied. “So she won’t be back for a while.” “Sorry to hear that,” he sighed. “How’s she getting on?” “Very well,” I replied. “She’s on her third lot of laundry and … Read more…
I saved 463 bucks on my car insurance today. Now I’ve just got to hope that I don’t get pulled over in the next 12 months.